It's been sometime since i last wrote, things have been crazy, and i know that is not an excuse. Today our beautiful Angel Alhana MaryJean is 7 months old. Everyday i wonder who she would look like, the sound of her laughter, her smile and what color eyes she would have, if they would have been hazel~brown like her daddy and brother or ice blue like Mommy. These are things we will never know, until we meet her again in heaven. We love and miss her so much, there is not a day that passes that Alhana is not on our minds, and there never will be. All of Her Clothes are still hanging up in between mine and daddy's. Which brings me to say that we found out On Monday we are having another Girl, and all of Alhana's clothes are going to be passed down to her baby sister. I don't know if that is a good idea or not, i am always going to wonder what Alhana would have looked like in her little dresses, and outfits. I want to buy this baby her OWN clothes but hubby thinks we should use Alhana's and that she would like that. i am sure she would, but they are her's. i don't know, i am confused. When we found out we were having another girl we started crying. we are happy but sad at the same time.
When we told Matty the news that he has another little sister on the way, he said "oh Lala in Mommy's belly"? referring to Alhana and we told him " No Sweetie" not Alhana, it's another baby, and she is NOT replacing Alhlana. We Make sure to tell him everyday that Alhana will always be his little sister and that he has two sisters. I think me being pregnant confuses him, because he was expecting Alhana to come home with us and instead she went home with the lord, and he is not sure what to make of this baby. We ALL were expecting her to come home with us. He will understand in time. And Matty is an awesome big brother. Every night he asks for Alhana's Urn so he can kiss her good night, he takes her little velvet bag with her ashes in it out, kisses it, say's "I Love You La LA" and sings "Rock A Bye Baby" to her. Then he yells I love you LA LA...sometimes he comes to me and says " Mommy Lala sleeping in the sky" and i tell him YES and he smiles and says "Oh".